Dad, can we talk?

Those are words that I hope to hear again, especially into her teenage years. And I have realized that for it to happen, I need to start building that trust now. My little girl started to tell me this past week about something that happened in pre-school. She stopped and was obviously uncomfortable with talking to me about it. My curiosity almost got the best of me, but I stayed patient and told her that she could tell me when she was ready. I was soon getting all the details about a little boy named Charlie who she liked. One of the other boys had teased her about it and she was hurt. Instinctively, I wanted to fix the problem...like most men do. Instead, I just listened and told her that I was sorry it had happened.

I am not sure what came over me, but I realized that all she really needed was for someone to listen and to hurt with her. I hope that this will make her feel comfortable about coming to me the next time something happens. I am convinced that the relationship between a father and his child in the early years will have a great impact on the teenage years. It was a seemingly small event in her life, but it had a profound impact on my learning to be a better dad. I hope it does the same for you.

Read to your kids

One of the most effective things you can do with your child that will impact her childhood development is read to her. Make it a part of the bedtime ritual. Just before she says her prayers and you tuck her in, grab two or three books and for about 10 to 15 minutes give her your undivided attention. Put the cell phone on vibrate, turn off the TV, and step into a child's heart and imagination. It isn't a qualifying event for the summer olympics so take your time. If she stops you and wants to know why Piglet walks on two feet, then make up your best response...sometimes the journey is the best part and a day spent in The Hundred Acre Wood is sure to generate a handful of questions. And the voices should not be optional. There is no better way to tap into her imagination than to make the story come to life with the sounds of the characters. All pride should be thrown out the window at this point. The excitement in her eyes as you narrate should be worth any abuse that you might face from the peanut gallery outside of the bedroom. I read to my little girl every night and it is something that I look forward to as much as she does. For daddies it can be difficult to break into this more sensitive role but I am convinced that the rewards do not stop with the child. So not only will you be building language skills and exercising you child's imagination, you might even be reminding your wife of why she married you.